I am just so excited to share that I worked on #s 35 & 41. As you can see from my previous post that these two goals were 35. Pray outside of the box and 41. Sing louder in church.
Today was the first time I visited church in a few weeks. I was feeling a little "lost" prior to Jeff's two week r&r from Iraq so I did not attend for a few weeks and I know it's not an excuse but we skipped church those two weeks.
But, the good news is I WENT TODAY! I was telling my husband and a few friends that I felt so GREAT at church today. Not because it's a wonderfully accepting house of the Lord, not because everyone has such great smiles, not because it's the only place you can worship in board shorts and bathing suits, not because I sat beside a good friend but because I FELT HIM! In the music, in the sermon, in the air I felt Him today. ALL AROUND ME! I had a very difficult week and for some reason I felt like He was not here, I cried last night asking "where are you when I need YOU" and I honestly felt His arms wrap around me and say "I'm here". I also told my husband today that I am starting to feel peace with my body's inability to carry a child. It pains my heart, I constantly wonder if I"ll ever have my own but I feel a sense of peace that He WILL provide.
Ok so back to my goals...I sang louder today. I did not blow anyone's ear drums out, but I sang louder. I sang TO Him, for Him, and in His honor. I sang louder.
My other goal, to pray outside of the box. This was something I did for myself. I asked msyelf to not just pray before bed, before meals or when I needed something but I prayed "outside of the box". I pulled into the driveway today and just felt an urgency come over my heart to pray for someone. I do not know if this person needed my prayers, but I just prayed for her. I also put in a little word for my dear husband and his soldiers ;) I prayed again in the middle of my kitchen. I thanked Him for the sermon He preached that I felt was directed toward me. The sermon was on comfort vs fear of Him. I have been struggling with "feeling him" and finding comfort in Him. I do fear him, oh boy do I fear Him. I know He saw me steal that cookie from the kitchen when I was younger and I still beg for His forgiveness. I just need to learn comfort in the Holy Spirit. I often doubt that someone, something, He is listening. And with a simple prayer in my kitchen, I felt Him again...two days in a row. What a glorious and wonderful Lord we serve.
"...and walking in the fear of the Lord, and in the comfort of the Holy Ghost, were multiplied."Acts 9: 31
Friday, March 13, 2009
So, Jeff just went back to Iraq after two wonderful weeks together and it has been a horrible week for me, but I realized this morning that I need to do something that will motivate me to stop being so sad. A few months ago I posted about 101 things that I would like to accomplish. While working on this list I also realized that giving myself a time limit was not the important part, it's accomplishing everything that I set out to do.
After spending a wonderful vacation with my wonderful husband I have a few updates for my "to do" list.
Also, feel free to share with me your list if you have one and if not, maybe this will encourage someone to start their own list. It's great to look at it and update it with my achievements and my near future goals.
1. Become closer to God (I feel like I am closer than ever!!)
2. Move to Colorado (January 2010)
3. Have a baby (another set back, but God has the healing power, right Angie?)
4. Finish my Master's in Education (getting closer by the minute...or paper)
5. Become a Certified Teacher in Colorado
6. Purchase Jeff's bike (SUPRISED HIM TWO WEEKS AGO)
7. Give back to my parents/in laws (BIG TIME)...working on that one right now.
8. Donate to children in honor of our 3 angel babies....5 angel babies now. :(
9. Do something special for Jeff (DID THAT....working on something else for October)
10. Finish losing weight (20 lbs down...only 10 more to go)....going to work off the 3 gained while he was home. Well worth the 3 lbs gain though.
11. Continue 8 miles a day (well, I've toned it down following doctors orders....lots of cardio though)
12. Save for baby fund (penny by penny)
13. Save for Italy fund (2011..not sure if that is still in the plans w/ this economy)
14. Visit after my sister has her baby (May/June....coming quickly)
15. Drive from Colorado to SC and PA
16. Visit DisneyLand or DisneyWorld
17. Become a full time teacher in Colorado
18. Keep up my 3.9 GPA...or get 4.0 (3.95 currently)! WOO HOO
19. Read the entire bible (working on this chapter by chapter)
20.Become debt free (minus Student loans) (WE'RE THERE....GOD IS GOOD!)
21. Make another deployment scrapbook (havent even started)
22. Encourage hubby to finish school (he's making that HIS priority now)
23. Strengthen my marriage (we're stronger than ever....I feel)
24. Make a new friend every month (made one this month so far)
25. Mow the backyard (I did it then hubby did it....guess it's my turn again.)
26. Deal with my grief from the miscarriages (starting over and picking up the pieces AGAIN)
27. Continue fertility options (April 1st VERY important doctor important)
28. Try a new meal (DID THAT DID THAT...while hubby was home. It was delicious)
29. Find out why Lucki (& now Makai) scratches so much. (hmm...no answers at the vet but it's getting better day by day.)
30. Save for a deposit on a new home (in about 8 years)
31. Trade in our cars for a safe SUV (well, anyone want to buy my car? Then, we'll buy a new SUV when we get to Colorado)
32. Enjoy Colorado's snow
33. Call my sister's more often (enjoying our weekly conversations)
34. Enjoy 5 moments w/o cell phone or interruption with hubby (LOVED EVERY SINGLE WAKING MOMENT OF IT THE PAST TWO WEEKS.)
35. Pray outside of the box (little inside thing) (focusing on that right now actually)
36. Finish my homework sooner than 1 day before due date (not happening...yet)
37. Study for the Praxis exams (test is March 21st...keep me in your prayers if you have room)
38. Ace the Praxis exams
39. Learn to be a little more patient (it's actually happening...thanks to prayer)
40. Clean my house from corner to corner monthly....or bi-monthly LOL (HAHAHAHAH)
41. Sing louder in church
42. Send out christmas cards with Jeff photoshopped in the pic (DID IT!)
43. Get an oil change every 3,000 miles without hubby nagging me. (DID IT!)
44. Start Jeff's car during this deployment every week. (hmmm....got a new battery now I have to keep that up)
45. Learn to be thankful for little things....like my puppies kisses. (learning...slowly)
46. Maintain garden in Hawaii AND Colorado (hmm...i need some help)
47. STAND UP FOR MYSELF! (i tried....i did it with one person..but not with the one person i needed to)
48. Work on my hearing (hmm..what'd you say?)
49. Host a great Christmas brunch (went home instead.)
50. Improve my aim (at the range)
New Goals: (silly, but they are mine.)
51. Encourage someone to get to know God.
52. Make room in my prayers for myself and my needs.
53. Keep asking questions and don't take no for an answer (KNOWLEDGE IF POWER ~ Angie Smith)
54. Become better with finances (in other words, find better deals).
55. Find out why my hip hurts so much. (doctor's suggestions are not working)
56. Stop biting my nails. (I have stopped so many times before...i can do this.)
57. Become more active with charities and fundraisers. (currently working on this in many ways.)
58. Remember to put the recycling boxes out every Tuesday. (NOT WEDNESDAY)
59. Convince Jeff we don't need another dog. (yes, he wants ANOTHER dog.)
60. Pray for one new person everyday. (even if I do not know them).....I think I do this anyway, but I want to pray for a new person throughout the day.
Ok, so if anyone is reading share your goals with me. It helps me to think of my own goals that I need to achieve and it might help you realize some things that you want to do.
I also forgot to mention one goal that I had was to go on a helicopter ride and NOT get sick. Well, during our two week r&r I DID IT! Here is a pic below. It was WONDERFUL.
I will post more pictures of our wonderful r&r later today.